dementiadeservesbetter.org — Advocacy & Action

The system is not designed
to protect your loved one.
We're building the tools
to change that.

Every family navigating dementia care encounters a system that moves fast, asks little, and tells less. The paperwork doesn't always match the person. The diagnosis often never comes. The rights exist — but only if you know to ask for them. This is the organizing infrastructure for everyone who has decided that is not acceptable.

"The only time the word dementia appeared in my father's entire care record was on his death certificate."

Penny Wrenn · Founder · The Curtis Wrenn Foundation

How we got here — and why it matters.

Penny Wrenn's father woke up in a nursing home not knowing how he got there. He had fallen. He asked for a copy of his own records. He was denied. He had never been formally declared legally incompetent — no court had ruled, no guardianship had been established, no formal process had removed his legal standing. He was a man whose rights were intact, asking for his own file, and the system said no. His daughter was calling from outside, watching this happen, with no official standing to intervene.

His care records documented cognitive decline in nurses' notes and behavioral observations. Memory care was being sold to the family as a service. But no physician ever attached a clinical dementia diagnosis that would have triggered a care protocol, a rights review, or a legal safeguard.

He died on September 9, 2021. On his death certificate: dementia. For the first and only time in any official record.

That is not one family's tragedy. That is a design failure — replicable, predictable, and preventable. It is happening to families right now. Dementia Deserves Better exists to document it, organize it, and push it back into the system as evidence for change.

Read the full founding essay at pennys.dad →
6.9M
Americans living with Alzheimer's dementia
Most are not in a facility. Most are being managed by families with no institutional standing and no shared protocol.
~50%
of dementia cases go undiagnosed
Cognitive decline documented informally without triggering the clinical diagnosis that protects patient rights.
$360B
annual cost of dementia care in the U.S.
The system generates this revenue. It does not consistently generate the diagnosis that protects the people paying for it.
2024
CMS GUIDE Model launched — 8-year federal initiative
First major federal investment in dementia care navigation. Most families have never heard of it.

The tools families need
and the system never gave them.

Everything Penny Wrenn learned about dementia care — the patient's bill of rights, what a clinical diagnosis actually requires, how proxy decisions are supposed to work — she learned by reading paperwork at midnight. This knowledge should not be hard to find.

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Before You Admit

The documents every family needs before a loved one enters a memory care facility. What to request, what to verify, what to refuse to sign without answers.

Get the checklist →
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Know Your Rights

Plain-language guide to patient rights in a dementia situation — what your loved one has the legal right to know, what you have the right to ask for, and how to ask for it.

Download the guide →
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Letter Templates

Advocacy letters to nursing home directors, insurance companies, and legislators. Based on actual rights gaps documented in real care situations.

Access templates →

Questions to Ask

Before you sign anything. Before a loved one is admitted. Before a proxy decision is made without you. The questions the brochure never answers.

Get the question list →
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Advocacy Talking Points

For conversations with legislators, facility administrators, insurance representatives, and regulatory bodies. The specific language that opens doors.

Download talking points →
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Petition Builder

"What happened to my family should not be legal." A framework for documenting care failures and converting them into legislative asks with teeth.

Start a petition →
Featured Resource

Know Before You Admit.

Before a loved one enters memory care — before the emergency, before the fall, before the paperwork that says what you wish you'd said earlier — these are the things every family needs to verify. Most families never ask. The system counts on that.

Clinical Documentation

  • Ask for a copy of the physician's clinical dementia diagnosis — not a nurse's note, a physician's order.
  • Verify that the care plan references the clinical diagnosis specifically.
  • Request the full patient records before any transfer of care is finalized.
  • Ask whether memory care is being offered as a medical recommendation or a facility service tier.
  • Confirm who the attending physician is and when they last assessed the patient.

Legal Protections

  • Ask who holds healthcare proxy — and get the documentation in writing before any procedure.
  • Ask whether any power of attorney, proxy designation, or financial arrangement has been made on behalf of your loved one — and get the documentation. These can be put in place without a formal court process and without notifying other family members.
  • Request a copy of the Patient Bill of Rights and ask facility staff to walk you through it.
  • Do not sign a financial arbitration clause without having it reviewed by an attorney.
  • Confirm which decisions the facility can make without the proxy's consent.

Family Communication

  • Establish a protocol for how and when the facility will contact each named family member.
  • Ask who family members can call when they have questions — and when that person is available.
  • Request that care updates be shared in writing, not only by phone.
  • Establish a shared family record of who has been told what and when.

Before You Sign

  • Do not sign admission paperwork in the same day as a crisis or emergency transfer.
  • Ask for 48 hours to review any documents you are being asked to sign.
  • Have someone outside the immediate situation review the admission contract.
  • Ask what the process is for disputing a care decision or lodging a complaint.
  • Confirm in writing what services are included in the base rate vs. what is billed separately.

Four pillars of organized advocacy.

Righteous indignation is the beginning. Organized infrastructure is what changes systems.

01

Know Your Rights

The legal protections that exist for patients and families in dementia care — and how to invoke them when the system doesn't volunteer them.

02

Share Your Story

Individual experiences are the evidence base for systemic change. This is where your story becomes someone else's protection.

03

Advocate for Change

From legislative letters to facility accountability — the tools and frameworks for converting documentation into pressure.

04

Find Your People

The person who is three years into this. The person who just started. The one who lost someone and now knows what no pamphlet covers.

The law is on your side.
Most families don't know that.

The federal CMS GUIDE Model, launched July 2024, represents the first major federal investment in dementia care navigation — an eight-year initiative designed to close the gap between what families experience and what the system is required to provide. Most families have never heard of it. Most facilities are not proactively explaining it.

The Patient's Bill of Rights in long-term care facilities is federal law. The right to receive information about one's own care. The right to know who holds proxy authority. The right to refuse treatment. The right to file a grievance without retaliation. These protections exist. They are not always honored.

Dementia Deserves Better gives families the language to invoke what they are already owed — and the organizing tools to hold facilities and legislators accountable when those protections fail.

"The system was not built to protect the person in the facility. It was built to manage them. Every family in this network is here to close the distance between those two things."
Penny Wrenn · Dementia Deserves Better

Built by the daughter
who was standing in the hallway.

Penny Wrenn is a journalist, media strategist, and 20-year practitioner of AI-assisted writing. She was not her father's primary caregiver. She was his daughter — involved, present, observing, and without official standing. She was the Supplemental. The one calling every Sunday and noticing things nobody was writing down.

What she saw in her father's care records, and the years of research she did to understand what she was seeing, are the foundation of this platform. Dementia Deserves Better is not built from a clinical credential. It is built from a journalist's instinct for documentation and a daughter's refusal to accept what the system called normal.

Read the founding essay · pennys.dad →

Fund the infrastructure families need.

The tools here are free. Building the platform that makes them findable, scalable, and effective requires support. Every contribution funds advocacy resources that families need and the system will not provide.

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